Friday, September 16, 2011

Vocabulary on : Relationships

In this post we can look at different relationships (dating, marriage, divorce) and learn how to use different verb phrases and vocabulary to use to talk about your relationship.


Dating
Usually, the 1st step in a relationship is going out on a date with someone. Here are some verb phrases you can use to talk about a date:

to go on a date (with someone)
I went out on a date with him once. It was kind of boring.

to have a date (with someone)
I have a date with Jamie tonight! We’re going out for dinner and then to a movie.

to go out (with someone)*
I’m going out with Fred tonight. We’re going to the U2 concert.


Note that in the above verb phrases, date is used as a noun. In this case, with is used to indicate that there is someone else on the date too.

However, when you want to talk about how long you have been in a relationship with someone, date is used as a verbWITHOUT with:

to date (someone)
I’ve been dating him for 4 months.
NOT X: I’ve been dating with him for 4 months.

She’s dating Ken.
I’m dating an incredible guy right now!
I’m tired of dating losers – I want a real man!



*to go out (with someone) can be an ambiguous phrase
- it could mean that you are spending time with friends:
I’m going out with the girls tonight!

- it could mean that you are on a date with someone:
I'm going out with Adam tonight. It's our first date!

- it could mean that you have been in a relationship for a long time with someone:
They’ve been going out for 5 years.
I’ve been going out with him for 2 ½ years.



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Marriage
When two people decide to get married, the man usually proposes to the woman, and asks “Will you marry me?”

After the proposal but before the wedding, the couple is engaged. They are engaged to be married.

They are engaged! They got engaged last month.

They plan to marry next month.

I intend to marry my current boyfriend.


The verb phrase to get married (to someone) is used to refer to the actual day of the wedding or the act of getting married.


They’re getting married on June 16th.

I really want to get married and have a family.


We got married when we were very young.

We got married on May 5th.



After the wedding, you can use be married (to someone):

We were married on May 5th 

I am married.

We are married.

She is married to Jim. 


Note that in ALL of the above sentences, with is NOT used with marry or married. This is a common mistake that English learners make:

Jim is my uncle. He's married to Samantha.
XJim is my uncle. He's married with Samantha. 



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The end of a relationship
Not all relationships end in marriage. Often couples break up. Sometimes the break-up is easy, sometimes it’s heart-breaking.

a break-up (noun)
to break up (verb)

It was not an easy break-up.

Did you hear that Jane and Kevin broke up last week?


Sometimes it takes people a long time to get over a break-up. They feel sad that the relationship is over, and it will take them awhile to feel better about it.

I’m still getting over Sam.

I’m still getting over my last boyfriend.

I’m still getting over my break-up with Sam.

You can refer to the person as your ex-girlfriend, or your ex-boyfriend, or just your ex.


Sadly, not all marriages last forever either! Sometimes couples will separate. They don’t want to live together anymore, but they don’t want to get divorced yet.

We are separated. We’re working through our marital problems.

We’re not divorced yet. We’re just separated.


You can be divorced, you can divorce (someone), or you can get a divorce (from someone):

I want a divorce!

It’s just not working out. We’re getting a divorce.

I was married for 10 years, but now I'm divorced.

He and his wife divorced 5 years ago.

After the divorce, you can refer to the person as your ex-husband or ex-wife, or just your ex.